There are some nights when I understand why people think they're evil...and want to shoot them in the face.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
What about the rest of us? The ones that are too smart for our own good, but not special enough to actually create a spark or make a difference in the world.
It’s a painful existence, really. To have all of this unfulfilled potential that you will never, ever expand upon.
You will never be a talented Janice Joplin, Amy Winehouse, DJ AM, you will never leave a mark on this world, but you’ve been told this entire life that you were special, you were smart, you would make a difference…
And suddenly you’re 40+ years old working in payroll, for God’s sake, living a completely unimportant, uneventful life that you just daydream through not really comprehending what has become of your life.
Or why you’re here. Because you’re smart enough to know that there’s something more to life, there’s got to be. And you’re important, right? You serve a purpose, you have to, because if you don’t, then what’s the fucking point?
You envy the stupid people, or the ones you perceive as stupid. The sheep, blindly plodding along, spouting off things like “God is good, God is Great, God make me a birthday cake” and you wonder how they live with themselves. And what it would be like to not think…to be able to shut your brain off for two seconds and follow the party line and bow down to Big Brother and to accept that there really is nothing more to life than work, work,work, an occasional moment of seemingly happiness, then back to the grind.
And that’s your life. Because you are special, but not special enough. You are too afraid to take the risk, to live “outside of the box”, to “achieve” your full potential.
So you sit…and you wait…for what, you don’t know. But there has to be more, right? You either pray for an enlightened moment or for brain damage; at this point, you don’t fucking care which one it is as long as you can shut your fucking thoughts off for two seconds.
And not remember that you were supposed to be special.